below the surface
by GaleSynch
Summary: AU, Lightning has never believed that her brother, Cloud's dead so she sets out to find him. She starts at where he's last heard from: Shinra Army. But only men can enter the army. What choice does she have but to cross-dress? As she enters Shinra's den of monsters, she learns that there are many secrets lurking below the surface that threatens to drown her.


**below the surface**

**summary: AU, **Lightning refuses to accept the fact that her brother, Cloud's gone for good and she sets out to find him. She starts at where she last heard of him, Shinra. But the catch is, he's in the army and only boys can join.

**pairings:** undecided for now - possibly, SephLightZack, AngSerah, Clerith, GenTifa.

**genre:** family/friendship/humor/romance

**warnings:** cussing, mild violence, mild incest (not too noticeable).

* * *

**I.**

"How do I look?"

A frown painted the face of the reflection as said person blew a stray strand of hair out of the way. Lightning spread her arms aside and winced as she breathed in. Her chest was painfully constricted but it was worth it considering the purpose of her disguise. Baggy pants and overlarge clothes hid her skin and true gender. It hurt to look at the mirror because she looked just like her twin brother, Cloud.

The person she was looking for.

"Splendidly like Cloud," Serah replied, rolling her eyes and tapping her foot.

"Great, I'm leaving then," Lightning turned, grabbing her backpack and tied the end of a rope to the nail on the wall. She pulled a few times to make sure it was secure.

"You're forgetting something," Serah sighed, muttering a 'this'll never work' under her breath when her older sister turned to stare at her, baffled. The younger girl twirled a finger at her temple; her sister scowled heavily, misinterpreting one another until Serah held up a scissors. Her older sister made a soft sound of agreement and thanked her, relieving her of the burden of cutting of her sister's precious hair.

A few large snips here and there and Cloud's perfect doppledanger was formed.

Serah winced, "Ugh," when she saw the gravity defying spikes - golden and pink at the end. But when her negative comments didn't seem to dampen her sister's determination, she softened, lurching forward and wrapping her arms around Lightning. "Be careful," she whispered.

Lightning patted her head comfortingly before she climbed out of the window.

* * *

Hitching a ride to Midgar was a piece of cake.

The security in Nibelheim was non-existent, so sneaking into a van was nothing - compared to what her mother will do to her once she found out she'd sneaked out. Lightning grunted softly, shifting around the cargo in the van taking her out of the snowy, sleepy town towards Costa del Sol - where she'd sneaked onto a ship and head straight towards Midgar. She rested her head on her crossed hands, hand sliding into her pocket for her pocket watch.

She flipped it open, pursing her lips as she studied her family picture - depicting, on the right, the last one she'd taken a photo with Cloud in it. Cloud wore his SOLDIER uniform proudly, a grin on his lips as he had his arms around his younger sisters. On the left was a picture of when they were younger, this time with their mother in it. Mrs. Strife was a beautiful red-haired aqua-eyed woman, Lightning and Serah inherited her eyes and face - their hair had been a mixture of red and blonde of their father's hair.

Everything about the woman was gentle; Lightning shuddered, those people who admired her and thought positively of her mother didn't know how scary she could be. Lightning trembled when she recalled of how her mother nearly disowned her older brother for sneaking off like that to join SOLDIER - she might've done so if Cloud hadn't returned as a SOLDIER Second.

Imagining what Rain Strife would do to her daughter if she ever returned... Lightning curled into a ball, not able to bear thinking about it, she should just get some shut-eye before that inevitable day comes.

* * *

It was with a stiff and sore body that Lightning managed to drag to Midgar.

Things did not go as well as she'd planned.

Imagining how she'd get to Midgar had been easy but when she go through it herself, she had a lot of things to say about her imagination. She'd arrived safely in Junon, undetected and managed to sneak out of the city - though she was nearly spotted multiple times - but she hadn't gotten a ride and thus, had to walk her whole way to Midgar. Fortunately, Lightning had always been the better-safe-than-sorry of the twins - while Cloud had been more reckless - and thus, had packed with her weeks of rations and water.

If she rationed the food well, she'd still have plenty to spare when she reached Midgar.

Midgar - the Metropolis of Dreams - was unlike she'd imagined it to be. Lightning had imagined the city to be sparkling with hopes and dreams, smiles and cheery grins on people's faces but in reality, the disguised girl was choking on the polluted air. It was completely unlike in Nilbeheim's calm and clean snowy air; it wasn't that either, there was that loudness of the streets and many pick-pockets - Lightning would've been robbed blind has she not learned martial arts and many other neat tricks from Zangan.

Lightning tiredly swap away the hand of another pickpocket, giving the younger child a nasty glare that sent him scampering. The only thing fueling Lightning now was her determination, stubbornness, and the thought of finally seeing Cloud after so long and reuniting their family. She wanted to go to Shinra and signed up immediately for the army - a step closer to Cloud - but she was hopelessly lost in the large city and no one even bothered glancing at her when she tried to ask a question.

She wondered, was this how Cloud felt when he first stepped into this city: overwhelmed but just staying out of the thought of family, determination and sheer stubbornness as the only fuel.

She gritted her teeth, if Cloud could do it, she, as his twin, could definitely do it too.

Lightning looked around with keen and alert eyes, grip on her bag tight so as to not lost it. She stopped, with some alarm, when she realized there was very poor lighting and she could barely see anymore than three feet before her. She cursed, stepping forward cautiously in the darkness, and soon, she was operating by pure instinct.

So far, her instinct had proven to be useful as she hadn't ran into a wall or any dead-ends.

Lightning stopped in her tracks, eyes tiredly eyeing the church before her skeptically. She strained her hearing and when she deemed it people-less, she pushed open the doors - which groaned loudly, announcing her arrival to the whole world and she rolled her eyes, so much for subtlety - and stepped in cautiously, eyes sweeping in rapidly to take in her new surroundings in fear she might need adapting.

She relaxed considerably as she inhaled the sweet scent of flowers - she hadn't seen so much as one in the perpetually winter town of Nilbeheim and Midgar was so polluted she doubted the plants' ability to survive here. A smile nearly blossomed on her lips; Lightning felt like she needed to smile to show how much she appreciated the flowers' beauty but she hadn't smiled for a long time - ever since the letter announcing Cloud's death arrived at their doorstep and all she felt then was her world crumbling.

Of course, Lightning had never believed such rubbish - Serah and their mother did though, and they cried an entire ocean. She didn't, promising herself to never cry because he wasn't dead yet and for now, she'd take on the responsibility of taking care of the family.

She and Cloud were - are - twins, their bond was powerful and she could totally feel him alive somewhere but their connection was dimmed, she couldn't pinpoint where she felt his aura emanating from. Her talk of feeling some sort of empathy link with Cloud was taken in as a joke but she didn't care what others had to think, as long as both she and Cloud knew the truth.

Cloud, Lightning curled into a tight ball on the flowerbed, closing her eyes and surrendering to the world of dreams filled with days that had a bright blue-eyed boy with spiky blonde hair as gold as the sun.

* * *

Someone was prodding her and even before her brain could register who or what it was, her body reacted, springing into action and into a fighting stance. The person who woke her let out a slight scream and retreated - from that action alone, Lightning registered that the person was a girl and was no fighter.

She squinted, dropping her stance and rubbing her eyes, before she looked at the girl who'd woken her up again. She blinked her jade eyes, feeling awkward when emerald green met hers. She hadn't been in the company of an individual - who didn't look at her with disdain - for a long time and she really didn't know how to proceed. She remained silent and impassive, keeping her face a blank mask as she didn't know how to express herself.

"Uh, hi?"

She shifted awkwardly, nodding politely back. "Hello, miss...?"

"Aerith," the green-eyed brunette finished with a smile, her hands clasped behind her back and Lightning had the sudden impression that this Aerith didn't know how to interact with her either. "That's my name. What's yours?"

That question, Lightning contemplated long and hard. "Er, Light - I mean, Storm Strife," she finally answered, recalling the name she'd put on her fake ID (made with Cloud's old, civilian ID, by replacing the name). "It's a pleasure to meet you, Aerith." Silence descended upon them again as both shuffled awkwardly until Lightning cleared her throat and said, "Hey, you don't see many flowers here in Midgar, huh?"

Aerith beamed and Lightning knew it had been the right topic to shift to. "Yes," the smaller girl replied enthusiastically. "These flowers are the only ones in Midgar - oh, aside from those growing in my house - and they are rare, aren't they?"

"So you sell these for gil?"

Aerith blinked, tilting her head to the side as if the idea had never occurred to her before. She slowly shook her head as she continued tending to her flowers. Lightning thought that was a pity, she'd be able to make quite a sum, if those glum people knew the meaning of beauty. "You should sell them, because it's... erm - Midgar full of flowers, wallet full of money!"

Aerith smiled blindingly, "I'll think about it. Maybe next time you'll see me in the streets - "

The doors to the church screeched open, announcing the arrival of another person - no, Lightning whirled around when she heard the sounds of heavy boots, the clicks and clinks of metal weapons. Her body tensed when she saw a group of men walking in; most of them wore the same leather uniforms, except for one redhead.

He already stood out, being the only with red hair and without a helmet, plus, his suit was different. He slouched and he was tapping a nightstick on his shoulder repeatedly, looking bored; he yawned tiredly, mockingly, before he glanced at the two girls - well, he only saw one chick (their target) and a girlish looking boy.

Aerith gasped fearfully, recognizing them and Lightning wondered what a sweet and gentle girl like Aerith would have to do with those rough men. "You know them?" Lightning asked in a low whisper as she assessed the group of dangerous looking man, counting their threat level (which was pretty high as they were outnumbered and they looked skilled) and their chance of escaping (they might be successful if there was a backdoor...) and any way out of this mess (judging from their stances, she doubted a diplomatic approach would be coming next).

Aerith nodded, unsure and fearful, her green gaze pleading as they met Lightning's sea-green. The cross-dressing shifted nervously, trying her best to hide it. "Be my bodyguard for a day?" Aerith offered with a shaky smile, her tone pleading despite the forced cheer and teasing note in it. "I'll repay you with a date!" Here, her cheeks tinted a little.

Lightning nearly rolled her eyes, seemed like her boy disguise worked too well. She weighed the matter in her mind, was it worth the risk, making enemies that weren't even hers and would've never bothered her if she'd just abandoned Aerith? No, it was not worth it and she'd gained nothing (Aerith wasn't even that useful of an ally) from this skirmish, quite the contrary actually.

What would Cloud do?

He'd protect Aerith, he'd always been a hero and that was what Lightning admired about it - it was also what made them so different, personality-wise. Despite being soft-spoken, passive and timid, he was a monster when it came to the well-being of others - stranger or not - while Lightning, concentrated, determined and rather spiteful, would prefer to do things that would only bring her good.

So, no she didn't really want to save Aerith that much. Worse, if they had no chance of getting out of this mess, she might receive a fate worse than Aerith's.

But, imagining Cloud, she could just see his disappointed face if she ever abandon Aerith to the hands of these man. And what if the person in Aerith's place was Serah? In the end, out of guilt, Lightning settled herself into a fighting stance, not responding as that redheaded man taunted her, sneering and leering.

The redhead finally decided trying to rile her up was a lost cause and nodded to the warriors to draw their weapons. Lightning tensed, though she swore she heard the murmured words from one of the men, "For a SOLDIER to be taking the orders of a Turk..." but she didn't have time to ponder as the closest man lunged at them.

Aerith let out a tiny shriek and retreated - just like when they'd first interacted.

Lightning dodged the first blow, surprise flitted across the man's face before Lightning reacted by punching him in the nose and damn did her hand hurt. She gritted her teeth, cursing herself for being so forgetful as she draw out her fighting gloves. The next time the warriors lunged, she was ready.

Her smaller and much more agile body easily allowed her to dodge their blows but she swore they were getting faster and faster - or maybe she was just tired?

Lightning's arms flew up, as quick as her namesake, pushing the fist of the man to the side and stepped closer, and delivered a right hook to the sensitive kidney - even though Lightning felt like kneeing the man's groin in spite. That was how Zangan taught his female (or, physically weaker) students, use the enemy's strengths as their own and Lightning had always been the man's best student.

Lightning brought her knee up as she pushed the man's neck downwards, but she miscalculated and instead of kneeing his face, she kneed his neck. She gasped in shock, as the man crumple to the ground, immobile but she didn't have time to ponder on his condition as the other men charged her with renewed strength and she could barely dodge their blows.

"Run!" she yelled to Aerith who nodded and fled through the backdoor. She followed suit, slamming the door shut and haphazardly stacking a pile of measly obstacles to block their pursuit.

The two girls ran, Aerith leading, down the dark path and through many twists and turns, only did they slow down. By then, both were bleeding heavily. Aerith keeled over, hands on her knees as she breathed in ragged breaths, mouth moving but unable to find the air to speak.

Lightning slumped down onto the ground flat, with no care as to her hygiene. Her aqua eyes were wide with shock as the encounter from before sunk in and one detail stuck out like a sore thumb: the man she'd kneed in the neck didn't move. She hoped that the man would be okay, alive and healthy and would live to see his family again but when he fell onto his back, she doubted she saw the man's chest rising and falling.

She shook, looked down at her hands that were covered in grime, dirt, bruises and cuts. But there was no blood. She had snapped the man's neck, no blood spilled, but he was still dead and she still felt as if his blood was on her hands. Dazed, she stared at her hands, wondering and fearing, why didn't she feel anything?

She couldn't even dredge up the feelings of dread, tiredness, rage, or even guilt. She could feel nothing, her senses didn't register, nulled, until she heard Aerith's soft crying and the crystalline tears going down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I made you kill someone - for me -" Aerith fell to her knees before her, and when she cried, she looked so much like Serah - the pale skin, the kind eyes and gentle smile, the ability to try to make things cheerful even in difficult times and tears when she blamed herself for something she didn't do - that Lightning's hands automatically wrapped around the other girl, murmuring soothing words into her ears, like Cloud and her mother did to her when she was upset.

_Cloud_, _where are you?_

* * *

"Essai..." Zack Fair stood in shock, unable to move a muscle, unable to do anything but blink as he gazed at his dead friend's listless form; how ironic, to die in such a holy place. Someone placed a hand on his shoulder, and applied pressure, pushing him gently away from how close he was crowded with the dead man. "Reno... we -I -"

"Don't pursue," the redheaded Turk said, holding out a hand to stop those already in a mad rage to kill the boy. "Watch." They did, glancing back, watching in awe as green tendrils emerged from the flowerbed and swirled around their friend, and much to their despair, in mere minutes, the body disintegrated.

Zack had heard from his mother about stories like these; of how when a living creature dies, it returns to the Planet. The tendrils were hands of the Lifestream, reaching out to reclaim their lost child. The tendrils were returning Essai to the cycle of life, truthfully, Zack didn't know how he should feel about this.

First that bubbled to the surface was rage. But it simmered down - unlike the rest of his buddies - when he recalled the young boy, trembling in exhaustion and desperation to hold his own, all because he wanted to protect his friend, or sister, or maybe sweetheart.

Then there was confusion. "You said we have to bring a runaway specimen back, is it the boy?" Reno glanced at him for a moment before he looked around the church, his eyes flickering wildly, as if trying to see a hidden camera, then he shook his head. "Then the girl?" Incredulity set in when he recalled the girl's weaker and trembling form, eyes glistening in fear at the violence surrounding her. "But... what sort of potential is there in her? She looks human, pretty even! It's that boy, small but so strong!"

"Yeah, strong, my ass," Sebastian, who'd approached the two a moment ago, spat on the ground, where Essai's body had been moments before. "I'm not forgetting him, I"m gonna hunt him down even if it's the last thing I fucking do! He's goin' ta' pay for what he did to ma' pal!"

Shouts and echoes of agreement followed; Zack hesitated, his tongue darting out to lick his dry lips but he was saved from responding - why were his buddies looking at him so coldly with murder in their eyes like that? - by Reno who spoke. "I dun thin' ya gonna be able to do tat, yo! Such skill, bossman's not gonna let him go, yo!"

Another one of Zack's buddies stepped forward, his helmet had been taken off, revealing his flaxen hair and earthen eyes, full of hate and distaste and grief as he gazed at the Turk. "I guess it suits you all, the bad and the bad, hmm?"

Reno sneered back, not at all seeming offended, if anything, he seemed amused - which probably irked the guys more and Zack was starting to regret even taking this assignment, he couldn't wait to get back and see Angeal about this, the man always had a way of soothing him. "Well, too bad, yo!" the redhead leered as he started walking away. He threw one last statement which chilled the group to the bone. "I'm gonna make sure pretty boy's scouted for SOLDIER, it's our job as Turks, yo, no hard feelings, dudes."

He threw a mock salute and sauntered down the stairs of the abandoned church.

* * *

Angeal's eyebrows rose when he heard what his student had said. He exchanged a glance with his friends; Sephiroth shrugged lightly, returning his attention to his paperwork, he didn't seem to care and if he didn't, Genesis certainly didn't, the auburn-haired man continued reading his precious LOVELESS, not at all seeming to care.

But this was their job, killing. Well, they slaughter monsters - but in the Wutai War going on, they were killing humans now, their own brethren and Angeal was getting disconcerted at how easily they accepted things and continue taking the lives of others - and though they kill humans, sometimes, in self-defense, it still wasn't right. But at least, they killed lesser than the Turks.

It was the only comfort SOLDIER had when they all made their first kill.

"Uh-huh," the burly First settled for saying which riled Zack up even more.

Zack stomp his foot childishly, "You don't get it, 'Geal!" he was saying through Sephiroth's continuous clicking of the mouse as he scrolled through the list of something - he's always checking new things out so nothing new there. "I mean, the kid's like really scrawny! He looks just like a girl - his hair's pink, at the end anyway, and can you believe that I thought it looked good on him?! Ugh, and his eyes are just like Seph's when he's glaring and the face is also the same - like he wants to mauls us or something - and he already did, look at Essai! We lost a perfectly good SOLDIER to him and Essai had a family, a sweetheart and -"

"Pup, stop. Breathe."

Zack stopped rambling and did as told, slumping down on the couch behind him, finally making Genesis look up. Lazily, the red clad man said, "Go see a psychiatrist. Period."

"The Turks work fast," Sephiroth's voice came from behind the computer screen, his left brow was high in faint, mocking impressed. His eyes darted from his friends to the computer screen, a silent message to come closer and they did. Zack's jaw dropped in horror when he saw the pretty face, marred by a glare, staring back at him. "Recognize him?"

"No way... it's him."

"Uh, Zack?" Angeal gazed at him, concerned, before he jabbed a thumb at the temporary platoon he'd been assigned to. "He's under your tutelage."

Before Zack could let out a long wail of horror, Genesis intercepted by pushing the youth away, eyes scrutinizing as he stared at the young boy's familiar features. "He looks a lot like on of our past SOLDIERs, doesn't he, Seph?"

"Siblings?"

A few clicks and taps on the keyboard and the results came out. "A mother, a sister and a brother." Another few clicks as Sephiroth pulled out new pages, typing in the name of one of their best SOLDIERs. "Doesn't match. Strife has two younger sisters, no brothers."

"Just a coincidence then."

Sephiroth was still looking at the face of the new recruit, contemplatively, before he nodded and closed the page. He turned in his chair to face his friends, Genesis smirked, snapping his book shut and straightening his stance. "What's for lunch?"

"Some Nibel dish, up for it? I heard they eat meat raw and their physical strength could almost match a weaker Third Class SOLDIER, you believe such rubbish?"

Sephiroth glanced at the new recruit's profile, the boy's face was still glaring out at the screen and his eyes were so piercing Sephiroth thought the boy was before him, glaring at him; he wondered will this child be able to do as such when they meet in reality. He glanced down, his eyelids lowering as a faint smirk curled on his face; the boy's hometown was Nilbeheim.

"No," he finally answered.

* * *

**AN**

**This is a cross-over and the story of both sides will take place, but as you can guess, Cloud and Lightning switched places. This is AU so events in the games/stories will happen differently. **

**Should Lightning be SOLDIER or a Turk? Do you agree with the pairing?**


End file.
